Thursday, August 22, 2013

My Thoughts on Seeing a Therapist

Taboo topics, for the win.
Yep, I see a therapist. I have for about 8 months now. The last time I was there she kinda-sorta tried to break up with me and I straight up told her no. I get it, she's having a baby soon and needs to figure that out and I'm not exactly high priority on her list of patients when it comes to real medical need, but she's pretty dang high on my priority list when it comes to doing real life so she isn't going to get rid of me that easily.
I started seeing her last December when my uncle got really sick and my family got overwhelming and my anxiety went through the roof. And we got into a sweet routine. I go in ~every 10 days, we talk for 45 minutes, she gives me some excellent perspective and I carry on with my life (and presumably she with hers.) I've told her about that pesky friendship that keeps popping back up - she's totally not a fan but she gets it, and she claims I've come a long way. She was one of the first people who knew about graduate school. I felt safe telling her because she hardly knew me then. She asked constantly about the Lenten Adventure and for the first time in 8 months, I sat in her office and sobbed a few weeks ago.
You may wonder how I found her... I googled. And then I called around. I knew I wanted to see a female, and I knew I was looking for someone who specialized in anxiety, relationships, and general life stuff. I also didn't really care what type of degree she had, so long as she was certified to see me as a patient. I wasn't sure the difference between a licensed counselor, LPC, LMFT, etc, and I figured it probably didn't matter so long as I found someone I clicked with. I 'interviewed' one woman to see if we'd be a good fit, but turns out she didn't take my insurance so I had to move on. My current doctor isn't particularly convenient (her hours are only 9am-5pm, so I have to take 1hr off work each week to see her) but for some reason I just felt like it worked when we first met. So we kept meeting, and a few weeks in she asked me how I felt things were going and I was honest; I felt really comfortable with her, felt like we had really established a good cadence for our appointments, and I really appreciated her perspective and oppenness with me. So we keep on keepin' on.
I think this happens, where people get attached to their therapists. I'm officially attached to mine. I don't particularly need her. My anxiety is under wraps mostly. My family is sane. I have a good routine that is only going to get more structured, not less. I feel appreciated and valued. But she is now part of my people. I just enjoy talking to her. I enjoy her perspective, her support, her calling me out on my antics. I like trying to predict how she will react when I tell her something. I genuinely enjoy therapy sessions because it's like talking to an unbiased friend. I think that's what it is designed for, but I also think therapy (seeing a therapist/psychologist/pyschiatrist) will be a different experience for everyone. Just like no 2 people are the same, no 2 experiences will be either.
So that's that - it's why I see a therapist, and why I'm not the least bit ashamed of it. No one should be. We all need somebody to talk to, who is on our side, always ready to help us stand up and be the best we can be. I'd encourage anyone who is considering it to take the leap. I was nervous at first, but it's been nothing but positive. I'll be right here cheering you on and hoping you find something and someone as wonderful and helpful as I have.

1 comment:

  1. I've actually been considering seeing a therapist/counselor/etc for a while. And for no particular reason, really but felt silly because of that. This might make me take the plunge!