This morning while I was procrastinating going to work I did a lot of things including texting my godfather, Dave. I said, "Hi Dave. Please send me your address! Love, Katie" Normally I don't write texts like that, with an intro and an ending, but he is old and technologically challenged so I figured I'd help him out.
His response: "if this is so you can send a thank you note remember: godfather means never having to send a thank you note. Tell your mom you sent me a long one and I will back you up. Just keep me up to date on the really important "young people" stuff like love life, girls gone wild appearances, gender change operations or other things I may need or want to know. Bye. Love Dave."
Just in case there were ever any questions, all of the aforementioned "young people" stuff require no updates because there are no updates.
love life = none
girls gone wild appearances = none
gender change operations = none
If any of these things require updating in the near future, I'll make sure to keep everyone abreast (har har har) of the news.
And, just for the record, he knows me well, because I did need his address in order to send a thank you card. They're called manners, dear godfather of mine, and I will use them no matter what you say. I'll just also include a little note on the outside of the card.
"Thanks for reminding me what I'm missing in my life and how boring I am. I needed the pick-me-up. Bye."