Don't Wrong Me On the Internet... I Have A Stalker at My Service!

My friend Roxxy* is the best internet stalker I know. She found out that a man she was dating was in fact a divorcee who wasn’t exactly telling the truth because it was all for the world to see on the internet. She helped me (although to no avail) find the person in my life that I still refer to as “the perfect man”…although he was far from perfect.

And now Roxxy has put her internet sleuthing to more good use. She & I share a love for a few blogs. One blogger in particular, Amanda*, really bugs Roxxy. Why? Because she has revealed very few details about her love life. She won’t specifically name her boyfriend, but instead refers to him with a nickname. This drives Roxxy insane. Like, can’t sleep at night because she’s trying to solve the mystery of who they are insane. Roxxy has already identified Amanda’s best friend as the ex-girlfriend of Roxxy’s ex-love interest based on some pictures Amanda posted, some Facebook stalking, and a few discrete text messages. I’m telling you – Roxxy's good.

So today, we are discussing various blogger’s lives over gchat as per usual (we need to get lives) when all of the sudden the conversation takes this direction: (my comments in italics)

Roxxy: oh have you figured out who amandas boyfriend is? (best friend? we already determined this rox, keep up)

Katie: haha no

Roxxy: i totally did some stalking yesterday morning (fyi yesterday was a Sunday)

Katie: hahahahaha, who is it?

Roxxy: jeff* the guy she met when she went there

Roxxy: his name is jeff west*

Katie: how the EFF did you figure that out

Roxxy: i remember someone saying his name in a comment so i kept googling (this comment was probably last year)

Roxxy: i thought his name was actually jeff east*

Roxxy: then i remembered her briefly mentioning him 4 years ago on her old blog that no one knows about but i found** (of course you did)

Roxxy: i found out it was jeff west

Katie: you are such an internet extraordinairre

Katie: is he cute?

Roxxy: so i googled him, found out he was from china***, through that found his twitter

Roxxy: matched up that their celebration was exactly when she made poop sandwiches****

Roxxy: also he twittered from china the exact times she dropped and picked up "the little monster" from the airport right around their celebration (i can picture her going back and forth, matching exact times, feeling tears of elation as she has solved the mystery)

Katie: OH. MY. GOD.

Roxxy: yep

Katie: you are a FREAK OF INTERNET NATURE.

Roxxy: im crazy but i HAD to know

Roxxy: http://www.facebook.com/jeff.west**

Roxxy: theres a picture

Katie: STOPIT.

Katie: oh he’s cute

Roxxy: yeah not my type but i mean good job amanda

*all names have been changed to protect the innocent (and stalked)
**situation has been exaggerated for humor’s sake

***location changed to match my inspiration for jeff west’s name

****this might be the best clue of the whole post if you are really trying to figure out who’s blog Roxxy actually stalked

Woof Woof!

The Dixie Chicks just came on my Pandora station (Sugarland radio!) and it reminded me of some fantastic news I heard the other day!

Two Dixie Chicks, Martie Maguire and Emily Robison, have joined together to form new country music group Court Yard Hounds! I got a chance to download the album, and I haven't listened to it yet but I wanted to let ya'll know it's available. As far as I can tell, the Chicks are still a group, and this is just a side project these two wanted to do while waiting for their 3rd partner in crime to prepare for recording a new album.

I know I was a huge Dixie Chicks fan back in the day (my 5th grade imagination got a little carried away with Goodbye, Earl!) and I am so so excited to sit down and give the new album a good listen. Maybe I'll burn it onto a CD and throw it in the car for those mornings when the radio shows do nothing but talk, talk, talk. Does that bug anyone else? I listen to the radio for music, not Miley Cyrus droning on and on about how there are aliens in her backyard.

Yes, that is what I heard on the radio this morning. I promptly changed it to a station playing REO Speedwagon.

That's all. Enjoy your weekends. I'm planning on making mine the best weekend ever!

An update: THE BUG.

In case you were wondering...

The little devil is still under my shoe. It's a cute one, too (the shoe I mean).

UGH UGH UGH.

Bugs-Be-Gone

Me and the outdoors, we have a pretty good relationship. I stay in, they stay out, it's that simple really. Condo living has made this living arrangement that much more agreeable, too. And whenever the outdoors has come inside, I've found whatever animals made their way in to be awfully considerate, arriving when the roommate's boyfriend (whom I lovingly refer to as my 1/2-bf) is conveniently over to properly dispose of them amidst our screaming and panic.

For instance, the time I was making jello shots in the kitchen, and Dustin is hanging out with me while Nicole was on a conference call, and I turn around and there is A LIZARD JUST CHILLING ON MY 2ND FLOOR KITCHEN TILES. Needless to say, while I jumped on the bar chairs nearest me and screamed and pointed, he calmly scooped it up and threw it over the balcony. Who knows if that conniving little lizard survived the fall, but alls I know is that it was out of my kitchen.

So this morning, I'm going through my morning routine, and I happened to be at the point where I sit down on the toilet. I glance over to my left, and JUMP UP OFF THE TOILET SCREAMING because there WAS A GIANT CENTIPEDE LOOKING BUG WITH CHOMPERS TWICE THE LENGTH OF HIS BODY AND A BAJILLION LITTLE LEGS. He was just crawling all over my bathroom wall at my eye height as if it was no big deal. As if I was in HIS SPACE. Apparently, how dare I.

So now I've got a bug on the wall, a toilet I'm afraid to go near because of said bug, and I've GOT to take a shower, and THERE IS NO ONE THERE TO KILL THE BUG EXCEPT NICOLE!!! And she's just as freaked out as me. So I jump in the shower, praying with all my might that he doesn't decide to follow me, take the fastest shower of my life, and get out, TO FIND THE LITTLE DEVIL SCAMPERING TOWARDS MY CLOTHES ON THE FLOOR. I realize this is my personal problem, leaving clothes on the bathroom floor and all, but I'll be damned if that little jerk was going to ruin perfectly good clothes by scurrying all through them. I scooped up my clothes, threw them on the counter, RAN for a shoe, waited for the perfect moment and

WHAM! Dude was dead. Or at least I hope so, because this happened at 7am and it's now 4:30pm and that shoe and the door it is in front of haven't moved, and won't until at least this time tomorrow. It's kind of a nuisance, too, because the shoe-that-killed-the-bug is holding the door open, but I have all my jewelry on the back of the door, and I hang my towel on the back of the door too. Oh well - lacking jewelry and a new towel hanging spot are well worth the sacrifice. Hopefully Dustin comes over later to clean up the bug guts.

But seriously... now is when I need some sort of immediately available man-friend. Maybe I should put that on an online dating website. Girl seeking bug killing boyfriend. I'm pathetic.

To Freeze or Not To Freeze, That is The Question!

I've fallen into the bad habit of not eating things before I presume they are going to expire. Or, buying things in excess with the idea that "oh, I'll just freeze it." I'm here to tell you about things that freeze well, and things that don't. More likely, things that don't.

Things that don't freeze well
1. Cream cheese. This may seem genius when cream cheese is on sale for $.25/package, but my suggestion would be to resist. It gets a weird texture when unfrozen. It's not the worst if you are using it to cook, but I don't recommend freezing and then thawing to spread on bagels.

2. Lettuce. Once, in a past life, I got the hare-brained idea that freezing an already dressed salad would prevent the lettuce from getting soggy. My apparently wiser, smarter, boyfriend of the moment suggested that it wouldn't work that well, and I INSISTED that the salad was worth saving and this was just the way to do it, and wouldn't it be a perfect lunch for him tomorrow. I was correct in that while frozen, the lettuce was not one bit soggy, but upon thawing, the lettuce was a lump of icky, green, stuff, less than ideal for lunch. Katie - 0, Boyfriend - 1.

3. Sour Cream. When I made tortilla soup, I had sour cream that was about to expire, so I dropped a dollop into each of the tupperwares of soup I was planning to freeze. Look at me, so smart, so savvy, so proud. Not the worst decision, but similar to the cream cheese... the sour cream just gets a little funny, in a weird texturous kind of way. Not recommended for freezing.

4. Cheese slices. Because once frozen, they don't separate like they are supposed to and you end up with little chunks everywhere. Maybe only annoying if you are extremely Type A, which I'm clearly not.


Things that freeze remarkably well
1. Shredded cheese. It thaws fantastically, it freezes great, and when you find those puppies on sale for $.42/bag, buy the whole lot of 'em. You'll have cheese for a year!

2. Fresh fruit. I make lots of smoothies, and sometimes I forget about my fruit. I've only attempted this with blackberries and mango, but just before they were going to go bad, I stuck the extras in the freezer and use them in my smoothies in the AM. PERFECT way to not waste fruit!

3. Buffalo Chicken Dip (and other dips, but not 7-Layer dip). Make some extra? Just throw it in the freezer and reheat later. Easy peasy. And still delicious!

4. Fresh lemon/lime juice. I learned this one courtesy of my mother. If you have lemons or limes that are on the brink of rotten, squeeze them into a plastic baggy or small tupperware and freeze it. It creates a neverending supply of fresh juice to use in cooking or cleaning or whatever else you need that kind of stuff for.

So that's it. I don't claim to be a whiz in the kitchen, but I've learned a thing or two about what to freeze and what not to freeze. Today I will attempt to freeze cooked and prepared pasta and a half-eaten egg roll, because it's what I brought for lunch but I'm going to take my parents up on going out for lunch instead. They only come into town once every few months, I take advantage while I can.

Stay tuned next week for who knows what. Adios and Happy Friday!

Save the Gulf

If you have ever been fortunate to have long, beautiful locks, then perhaps you have also considered donating to Locks of Love. My hair gets ratty after a certain length, so I have to keep it above the chest, but Access Atlanta has informed me of a great way to help support the efforts in the Gulf of Mexico, so I thought I would bring it here to you, and help spread the word.

Click the image above for a link to the Access Atlanta story about the drive, and if you aren't in the Atlanta area, ask around at local salons or check the organizations website - I bet there are other places that would be willing to do the same thing.

Happy Mother's Day

To the woman who, after many long years of being my worst enemy, is now my best friend, the person I call when everything is right (and more often when everything seems wrong), and my voice of reason.

She hits my sister for me when Lauren is being bad... (basically all the time)

And she poses for pictures on the beach even though she really didn't want to. Because that's what mom's' do, things their daughters tell them to even if they REALLLLLLLLLY don't want to, and will probably kill said daughters when they see that their picture has been posted on the internet.

And back in the stone ages (like 1952 or something), she looked like this and modeled in a fashion show. Ow Ow!

Mom, I love you! Thanks for being the best, and for loving me no matter what. I know you kind of had to, but still... you mean the world to me! And for the record... just like you are more and more like Grandma every day, I am more and more like you. I've just kind of embraced it, because really, there are a lot worse things to be.

Happy Mother's Day!

My favorite text message.

This morning while I was procrastinating going to work I did a lot of things including texting my godfather, Dave. I said, "Hi Dave. Please send me your address! Love, Katie" Normally I don't write texts like that, with an intro and an ending, but he is old and technologically challenged so I figured I'd help him out.

His response: "if this is so you can send a thank you note remember: godfather means never having to send a thank you note. Tell your mom you sent me a long one and I will back you up. Just keep me up to date on the really important "young people" stuff like love life, girls gone wild appearances, gender change operations or other things I may need or want to know. Bye. Love Dave."

Just in case there were ever any questions, all of the aforementioned "young people" stuff require no updates because there are no updates.

love life = none
girls gone wild appearances = none
gender change operations = none

If any of these things require updating in the near future, I'll make sure to keep everyone abreast (har har har) of the news.

And, just for the record, he knows me well, because I did need his address in order to send a thank you card. They're called manners, dear godfather of mine, and I will use them no matter what you say. I'll just also include a little note on the outside of the card.

"Thanks for reminding me what I'm missing in my life and how boring I am. I needed the pick-me-up. Bye."

Today

I didn't set an alarm last night. On purpose. I woke up this morning, went back to sleep, woke up again, and finally got up. I didn't even look at my closet as I stumbled into the bathroom and showered. I still didn't look at my closet as I made a few phone calls and wrote some thank you cards. I finally looked at my closet, and I had already decided I was going to wear jeans today. Bossman in China = jeans and sundresses all week. Now to come up with a top... and shoes. I put on something. I was comfy, and super casual. I didn't care. But I kept thinking I was showing a little too much cleave for work and maybe I was a little tooooo casual. Dangit. Back to the drawing board.

How I miss the days of personal assistant-ing, when my biggest clothing concern was whether or not I had to go to "the scary store" aka Intermix at Phipps Plaza, in which case I would panic momentarily and then pretend I was some Buckhead mom fresh from my workout and carry on in the workout-esque attire I was going to wear originally. But anyway, that's not my life anymore and clearly I've moved on and don't miss it at all. Clearly. And don't mind my freakish fears. I know you have them too.

So I finally settled on a shirt that has way too much sentimental value, a new tank top underneath, and a pair of wedges that hurt my feet. A lot. It all goes together kind of, but really, none of it matches, and somehow I convinced myself before walking out of the house that I had that 'messy mismatching thing' going on. Well guess what. That lasted all of about the 45 second walk into my building, and I've spent the rest of the day wishing I had not wasted 30 minutes trying to be "creative."

And you better believe I even convinced myself this would be a GREAT outfit for my 5th of May celebrations. Well, guess who's going home to change after work?

This girl. Learn from my mistakes, and think twice before you put on a 'messy mismatching thing' and just stick with what you know. Or maybe I should take my own advice. And just so you know, tomorrow I'm wearing a tshirt. And maybe my sweatpants. At least that's what I keep threatening. Somebody has to keep things interesting around here, and I've appointed myself.

Sitting uncomfortably at my desk trying to hide my outfit from everyone even though I work with all men who tell me daily that I look wonderful,
Miss Katie

Making New Friends

We all have friends. I've posted here before about how great my girlfriends are. Really, I have fantastic friends. But those fantastic friends have done the following things:

- find boyfriends who require lots of time
- go to graduate school across the country
- move to other cities for work

All of the above has required me to start making new friends. Well guess what? I think making new friends is hard when you are living in the real-world. Gone are the days of meeting people in class, or at a frat party. Instead we meet people at work or through work. Unfortunately for me, my office is completely male-dominated, and everyone is at least 10 years my senior (no offense co-workers!). So, having exhausted that friend source, I've had to really find other ways to make friends. So, I'm here to offer you a few suggestions on ways to make new friends based on what has worked for me and what I want to try!

1. Join a church/synagogue/spiritual group. There are many ways to go about this. You can volunteer to teach religious school, you can participate in Young Adult activities... there seems to be something for everyone.
2. Take classes at the gym. If you go to the same class every week, you are bound to see familiar faces and can begin to develop relationships. This could be hit or miss, but at least provides some social interaction.
3. Join a sports league. Atlanta has kickball, dodgeball, volleyball, basketball, and I'm sure every other sport imaginable available for adults. This is probably easier when done with a friend, but desperate times call for desperate measures!
4. Attend free networking events within your industry or that you hear about through friends. The whole purpose of the event is to meet new people and network, so 90% of the work is done for you!
5. Choose an organization to volunteer with. It could be the Humane Society, a local Food Bank, or a children's organization. You surely won't be the only volunteer!

What's important, at least for me, to remember is that with all of these things, you have to be willing to put yourself out there a little bit. Attempting to make friends can be uncomfortable and awkward, but if you are willing to deal with a little bit of awkwardness in exchange for great relationships, I think the reward will be well worth the sacrifice!