I'm leaving today for an 11 day vacation. It's probably the most structured #kanda vacation we've taken. And it's probably the one I'm the most nervous about.
See, the last 9 months have been nothing but GO. GO. GO. And every time I think I have a spare moment, time to think, time to just be, I don't. I fill the empty times with a TV show, with a book, with dinner out with friends, with anything. I haven't let myself just be alone with my thoughts in 9 months, if not longer.
I'm not really sure why. I'd imagine many of you are psychoanalyzing me at the moment and wondering what I am running from, what I'm shutting myself off to. Honestly, it hasn't been a conscious decision. I really and truly haven't had the time, and when I do have the time, I find myself wondering what I should be doing instead. Don't get me wrong, I've taken time for me. I've spent entire Saturdays on the couch watching Lifetime movies. But that's not the same as disconnecting from the world and just being by myself.
What I just realized is I'm about to spend a solid 24 hours with me, in my own head, with no outside distractions. When you are stuck in a tube 35K feet above ground for 3+10+3 hours and a few layovers in between, that's about your only option. Of course I will have company - my most favorite sidekick, travel buddy, BFF will be with me every single second of every day.
But this trip, for me, is about completely disconnecting. Forgetting responsibility, work, school, about the house I have to clean, the friends I need to be connecting with, and instead just focusing on ME. Doing all the things that I want to do, laying around on a boat all day in the glorious sunshine just to feel the warmth on my face. Exploring islands for hours and hours and hours just to appreciate the beauty of this astounding world.
So with that, I bid you zbogom, which means goodbye in Croatian. I'm off to do nothing.
So with that, I bid you zbogom, which means goodbye in Croatian. I'm off to do nothing.
