Here's what I want to know though.
Ladies: When you go out on a date with a guy, what do you do when the bill comes (assuming you were at dinner)?
Dudes: When you take a lady out on a date, what do you expect her to do when the bill comes?
I've kind of discussed this before, but not necessarily in this context (and it was a long while ago).
Here is what I do, and I think based on a brief Twitter poll it is incorrect. Can you believe I am publicly admitting I might be wrong?
If I met the dude via online dating, my expectation is that he is going to pay and I do not offer. I do not reach for my wallet, I do not pretend to reach for the bill when it gets to the table. I simply let him take the check and make sure I say thank you more than once. I had to explain this to a friend last night and my thought was this. When you are participating in online dating, especially on a site where you pay to use it, it's kind of like the first date has already happened. When you actually meet with someone, you really have gone through all the first date crap. You know where they are from, a few things they like to do...you've done the basics. I see it as online dating skips straight to a second date. Am I making sense? How snobby and bratty does that make me sound? Don't be honest.
But, if I met a guy out at a bar and he got my number and we're going on a date, I think I'd assess the situation a little differently. I might even offer to leave the tip (if I have cash and if it's appropriate) or pay for the valet. Whatever will work.
But really, I think I am old fashioned. I think it's stupid that girls (my friends) reach for their wallets with no intention of actually paying. And really, if I'm going out on a first or second date with a guy who wanted to go dutch, we probably shouldn't be going out in the first place.
So back to my original questions.
Ladies: When you go out on a date with a guy, what do you do when the bill comes (assuming you were at dinner)?
Dudes: When you take a lady out on a date, what do you expect her to do when the bill comes?
i think it depends on who invited who on the date. if the guy initiated the contact online + asked you out, i believe he should pay. if you were the one who sent the first emails/set up the date, then i think you should offer to pay. when i dated 5+ years ago, most of the time guys wouldn't even let me pay if i offered, but i still think if you initiated the contact/date, you should offer.
ReplyDeleteIt would be a total deal breaker if a guy ever asked me to pay - I just think it's what the guy should do, always!
ReplyDeleteWell, I don't count! Haha. Cause you know, the whole joint money thing and all. But I think that whoever has asked the person out on the date should pay. And if that's you, you should at least offer to pay. But if he did the asking, then it's on him!
ReplyDeleteI do the awkward reach for my wallet with no intention to pay. However, I think that if a guy were to make me pay for my part of dinner, it would be done then. I know I am old fashioned when it comes to that, but that's the way I was raised and how pretty much everyone in the south was raised. So I guess I kind of just expect it. Sounds so bratty!
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